My about me section may now be slightly misleading. I’m (hopefully) no longer going to be referred to as shopgirl. I sold on my shop’s lease and ran away to join the circus the big-bad South East. Hence my sleeping on my sister’s sofa. I’m now pursuing an exciting career of living in other people’s houses and looking after their children/pets/houseplants/laundry.
Oh yes. Welcome to the new exciting world of....
*fanfare* domestic-help-girl. *disappointingly small confetti burst*
Looking at the potential ways to start this career, a placement as a School matron jumped out at me.
Oooh, live in, look after hundreds of small children rather than one or two, and wash hundreds of tiny pairs of socks.
Cute.
It was even actually in my old school. Where, yes, I had in fact boarded myself. Briefly. But still, nice building, and I'd have advantage of already knowing every nook and cranny of the place.
Plus, all I remember of the matron when I was there was a startling amount of tea drinking. Sounded ideal.
But then I had to let the position go before I even got around to returning my application pack. The interview day was on the morning me, G, and her boyfriend had decided to go mushroom hunting. The magic kind. And nothing was going to get in the way of our quest for free, tasty hallucinogens.
I wasn't too sure that 'sorry, can we reschedule the interview, please? I have a prior engagement with drugs' excuse was going to wash with a private school, so, bye bye potential job! Somehow, they might not find drug use a bonus to applying for a job with children.
Kids and class A's don’t mix. Well, could be potentially a fun experiment, but probably not one to introduce at the interview stage.....
Oooh, live in, look after hundreds of small children rather than one or two, and wash hundreds of tiny pairs of socks.
Cute.
It was even actually in my old school. Where, yes, I had in fact boarded myself. Briefly. But still, nice building, and I'd have advantage of already knowing every nook and cranny of the place.
Plus, all I remember of the matron when I was there was a startling amount of tea drinking. Sounded ideal.
But then I had to let the position go before I even got around to returning my application pack. The interview day was on the morning me, G, and her boyfriend had decided to go mushroom hunting. The magic kind. And nothing was going to get in the way of our quest for free, tasty hallucinogens.
I wasn't too sure that 'sorry, can we reschedule the interview, please? I have a prior engagement with drugs' excuse was going to wash with a private school, so, bye bye potential job! Somehow, they might not find drug use a bonus to applying for a job with children.
Kids and class A's don’t mix. Well, could be potentially a fun experiment, but probably not one to introduce at the interview stage.....
Aha, but you are wrong! Remember my interview for a position working with children?
ReplyDeleteThey brought a 12-year-old in and said "Please sell this child a lollipop."
I picked up the lollipop in its little plastic holder thingy, told him how good it tasted, and then said: "And when you've finished with the lollipop, you can use the case to smuggle drugs across the border."
And I got the job. So there. :P
However, my boss did turn out to be a maniac, and I did quit four months later...
I remember that... wasn't it some kind of charity thing?
ReplyDelete